All Conferences, All the Time

conference venues VictoriaIs there a word for when you’re addicted to conferences? I guess not, since there’s not really a word for addictions to EVERYTHING. I mean, there are no words for people addicted to milk, or cupcakes.

But I really am addicted to attending conferences. I go to at least one a month, sometimes more if I can swing it. I love meeting new people, but also, I love not having to see those new people afterwards. It’s the perfect balance of personal and impersonal. I reject all friend requests on Visage-Tome. It’s my personal policy not to get attached to any other conference attendees.

As a result, I have a comprehensive map of all the conference venues in Victoria, and even across the rest of Australia. My expertise in the matter is so good, I could probably start charging as a consultant. I can tell you which places have drafts, which ones come with great catering (Lorne), the ones that have comfy seats in their lecture halls and those that are close to amenities for those late-night sugar cravings we tend to get while on those things.

Of course, I’m a veteran now. I always bring a secret supply of sugar; generally keeps me going. Oh, and the beds/ The beds are VERY important in a conference venue, I can tell you that. As good as I’ve gotten at sleeping in different places, sometimes my skills are put to the absolute test with the terrible, stone-consistency mattresses they make us sleep on. Fortunately, those ones are in the minority. I actually find that the function venues in Victoria are quite a bit better than those you find elsewhere. I’m about to head out to a conference in Brisbane that LOOKS lovely. I’ll have to update my rankings once I get back. Except I’m going straight to that one in Perth, and then one an hour away from here…and it’s still not enough.


There’s Life in Those Antennas Still

TV antenna repair MelbourneThey need to keep millennials from writing opinion pieces, because most of it is tripe. Just because people are young doesn’t instantly make them wise sages, but this generation in particular seems to think that they know better than everyone.

‘The End of Politics: Why A Hereditary Monarchy is the Best Thing for Australia.’ They actually published it, and people wrote in the week after to praise the writer’s profound insight. What insight?

And this week it’s even worse. ‘Say Goodbye to the TV Generation: Why Melbourne’s TV Antennas Are Soon Going to be Viewed in Museums’. It was written by that Victoria Pierce, too. Can’t even stand the look of her face. Of course, she’s arguing that streaming has basically killed normal television, and that we’re now living in a glorious neo-era of digital, on-demand television. And of course, she seemed to think that since this was a new thing, that automatically made it wonderful and amazing.

Give me a break! The age of TV antennas and regular TV is far from over, even if there are more options now. With streaming, when are you going to have the big event? What’s going to happen when people want something to do on a Friday night and they want it to be more than just a private bit of screening? Television brings us together in a way that streaming simply cannot. Some people LIKE looking up things in a TV guide and being there for the big premier. In fact, if everyone was there for the big premier, then spoilers wouldn’t be an issue.

I should write into the newspaper and stick up for antennas in Melbourne. Or better, I’ll write an opposing piece. People LOVE newspaper drama. It’s like internet drama, except it’s in print and you can’t delete it. So it’s better in every way. Not to mention that it can be framed and hung on the wall, not that I’d do that or anything. 


Energy Storage for the Mech-Suit Revolution

commercial energy storageProbably the biggest obstacle to the utter domination of the mech-suit trend is conservation of energy. Oh, people are ALWAYS on about proper energy usage, energy-saving bulbs, green power, saving the planet…and all those things are good. But are they better than owning your very own mech-suit, with built in fridge and cup holders? No, I didn’t think so. I’d be quite willing to turn off a few lights if I could get my hands on something that good.

Fortunately there are a few people willing to come up with solutions. Commercial energy storage is now greater than ever, and combined with advances in solar energy storage it seems like we might be fulfilling our mech dream sooner rather than later. My ultimate dream is a society where mech-suits are basically like mobile phones: you don’t leave home without them. Commercial solar energy will be a constant feature, so you’ll charge your mech simply by walking around. You can even stock up on energy at home and bring a spare battery with you…in fact, this may be mandatory. Wouldn’t want anyone to run out while they’re away from home. They’d have to climb out and just leave their suit where it failed, and then they’d be humiliated in this sea of mech-suited people who actually have power. Then again, that’s sort of how it works now with phones, so…maybe the response will be that all public places will have mech charging stations. They will become that important to our lives.

They’ll take a lot of power, mind you, despite how they’ll propel mankind into the correct century. We’ll be needing all sorts of wonderful industrial energy storage methods. It’s not like the jet boosters are going to work after plugging the suit into the wall for a few minutes! Think of the time we’ll save on our daily commute to work.