Na-na-na-na-na-na, Bathman

bathroom designerGood grief…I was just flicking through the channels and stumbled across the Golden Oldies on channel 62. They were playing that old, campy ‘Bathman and Bobbin’ series from the 1960s, and I seriously couldn’t believe that anyone used to watch this.

Nowadays, Bathman is a serious, brooding figure who sneaks into people’s houses to give them bathroom remodels, but never stays to be thanked and always left a calling card inside the bath. Usually it was a rubber duckie. A dark, edgy rubber duckie, to remind people that even though their new bathroom is wonderful, life will always be sheer pain.

But the sixties version? Hoo boy, none of that. He still does bathroom remodelling, but people actually CALL him with a silly bath signal in the sky. Some villain would invade a public bathroom, carve graffiti into the walls, mess up the sinks and steal the toilet roll covers, and the stereotypical Scottish chief would call Bathman on the signal. Bathman and Bobbin (that’s his sidekick that dresses up like a rubber duck) would dash to the scene in a car that’s clearly just a regular car, painted white with a few taps sticking out of random places, and they’d get caught by the evil villain. They’d escape the trap, do the bathroom renovations in the nick of time, and the day would be saved.

I guess I just don’t like it because it portrays Bathman as just another campy superhero. He’s not supposed to be a normal do-gooder in ill-fitting spandex. He’s the night…he’s the one who strikes from the shadows with premium bathroom designer grace and poise, before going back to his Bathcave (basically, a really big and nice bathroom) to mourn the fact that he’s not rich because his parents are way too healthy to die and give him an inheritance, and they refuse to let him have any more pocket money than non-rich kids.

-Lem

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