Funny how there are some old shows that you miss, and others that you don’t. I remember being obsessed with Colonel Universe for a good year or so. And I mean I was wearing t-shirts and trying to convert all my friends at school into watching it too. I was a fanatic, and then suddenly they stopped airing it and I dropped off. No more interest. It was all in the sugary-sweet buzz.
But there was also a show I loved just afterwards, Kid Cops. It was about little kids solving crimes, with all their voices dubbed over with adults. In retrospect, it was kind of creepy, but it’s what I loved, and I still kind of do. Their methods for handling evidence bags were a little bit off, though. Like, right now I’m well into cop shows, having seen many, many more that star adults and people who do research into this kind of thing, and the police bags on Kid Cops were a joke. One time, Tammy (she was the four-year-old with the blonde hair- secretly in love with Jason, five years old, dark and handsome, I guess) was at a crime scene, I think maybe in the season 2 finale. Anyway, she picked up a severed toe and put it in the bag, and then if you look at her in the background of the next conversation, she’s just…swinging it around. I don’t even think she sealed it properly, she’s just…I don’t know. There are all kinds of blatant breakings of policing rules if you look at the kids in the background. Like when Suzie was investigating a double-homicide by a crazed schizophrenic, and she just waltzes into his apartment without a warrant. What mad kid stuff! Sometimes it was the child actors, sometimes not. But I’ve been catching up now that I’m older and wiser, and some of the things they do just wouldn’t fly if it wasn’t a kids’ show. All that wasted security packaging, with a generation of kids just not knowing how it all works.
I never thought I’d be standing in the fragrance section of Myers, staring at a beauty range that gets me. I’m not into ‘self-care’, I don’t subscribe to ‘pampering’ and sometimes I’ll just go to work with no makeup. More minutes in bed, and I can just toss my hair in a ponytail. I work in a cubicle and interact with the public on the phone, so it’s only my co-workers who have to suffer. And they’re used to it- we’re all friends here!
But now, I’ve found the makeup for me, and it’s transforming my life. According to the big cut-out sign they had when the line was released, it all began with a diploma of specialist makeup offered in Brisbane. The creator emerged with bigger dreams than simply going to some movie set or backstage of a theatre: she wanted to OWN the makeup world. That was what it said, anyway…the fact that she’s now offering a niche service makes me wonder if they’re not just embellishing a bit. Anyway, she used her makeup course to create something wonderful: Wallflower, a makeup line for people who don’t want to be noticed.
Seeing this, it was like a product had finally been tailor-made for my life. I love going to parties, but HATE being the centre of attention. But there’s a weird societal expectation that you have to look really nice for a party, your best, even. So if you want to go and have people not notice you…well, there’s no middle ground. You’re either admired and accepted, or judged for not scrubbing up enough. But now, there’s Wallflower! I’ve already used it for a work function, and it was perfect. I liked what I saw in the mirror, but I was able to hang around at the punch bowl and no one bothered me unless I wanted them to. It’s like some kind of magic.
Sure, Estelle tested the products on herself and was horribly scarred, but there’s a quote from her where she says it was all worth it. Gee, I should get on one of these makeup courses. Around Melbourne…yeah, there should be a few. Now I know makeup really can transform lives!